Big Brother Recap: "An Urgent Personal Matter"

You don’t have to be a Big Brother fan to have heard the news of “Evel Dick” Donato’s exit from the Big Brother house earlier this week. Many mainstream media sites were reporting Evel Dick’s “removal” from the house, but no one knew the exact circumstances. CBS promised answers in tonight’s episode of Big Brother, but did we get them?

My Random Thoughts:

- Aren’t you a little sick of the Big Brother voice-over voice constantly telling us multiple times EVERY SEASON that “a surprise twist sent shockwaves through the house”?

- Did anyone else appreciate the irony of Rachel getting frustrated with Porsche crying over being nominated? I mean, last season, Rachel was the queen of irrational crying, and now she’s upset at someone else crying for “no reason”? The veterans then went on and on about Porsche being ditzy, and I thought that they were being a little hard on her, until they cut to Porshe in the Diary Room, and I heard her say “supposably.”

- I’m more than a little annoyed that we didn’t get a full explanation on what happened with Evel Dick. There’s no need to build drama and throw in a commercial break when everyone knows that Dick is leaving this episode. This is the Big Brother equivalent of The Amazing Race showing us 10 minutes of airport drama just to find out everyone is on the same flight.

- So, after a few days of promising that we would get answers on Wednesday’s episode, we get told that Evel Dick left because of “an urgent personal matter”? That’s all we get? Are you kidding me? I can understand if whatever the situation is has to remain private, but then don’t have it everywhere for 4 days, and advertise that viewers will find out the reason on Wednesday. At least Daniele got the Golden Key out of this ridiculous situation, which only seemed fair.

- After finding out that Keith was “smiling” about Dick leaving the house, Brendon went all Neanderthal (or is it “Neander-TAL?”) and had to be restrained from going downstairs and confronting Keith. What exactly was he going to do, yell at him for smiling? That would be the worst confrontation ever. It would have been more dramatic to have him draw attention to whatever the hell that white spot was on the side of Keith’s head. What the hell was that? Was it a missed spot from shaving? Maybe Afterbite from an insect bite?

- Jeff was trying to being positive in a room of negativity after everyone was talking about the effects of Dick leaving the game. “Let’s knuckle up like Rocky”, he told them. Wait a minute, Jeff, I know that Rocky is the universal symbol of the underdog who makes good, but being that you’re from Chicago (and who could ever mistake that from your accent???), shouldn’t you have maybe gone with a Michael Jordan reference…or Oprah?

- It turns out Keith was celebrating Dick’s exit because, as he put it, “now I can make my move on Dani.” He then went on to celebrate in front of the mirror with “air free throws.”

One thing I’ve noticed is that Keith is far too paranoid to win this game. That whole scene in the Have Not room was very awkward, when he tried to call Porsche and Kalia out on working with the veterans. Everyone else in the room was looking at him like he was insane. The guy was clearly panicking…he was rambling. Seriously man, you need to breathe. If only he had something to control his breathing…you know, like scuba divers use…maybe A REGULATOR?

- Last season I had to impose a “Brigade Count” for every episode, and I’m afraid I’m going to have to do it again this season with this ridiculous Regulators nickname. The count in this episode, for the record, was 5. (Please note that the count includes the word “regulators”, as well as “regulate” when used to describe what these morons plan to do to the rest of the house.)

- The Veto competition was annoying: essentially it boiled down to houseguests in Superhero costumes and Adam yelling. His hosting was painful, and I beg the houseguests to never select him as host again. The competition itself was painful to watch, too, with one team trying to win (Rachel and Brendon), one team completely hopeless (Jeff and Jordan), and one team with both members trying to throw it…for different reasons. Look how this Golden key/Duo twist has changed the game already: when have you ever seen the nominated houseguests both trying to throw the very first POV competition?

- Brenchel predictably kept the nominations the same, so we’ll see tomorrow night if it’s Keith or Porsche that goes home. Interesting that there was no discussion of not evicting anyone since Dick left the house, don’t you think? How will Dick’s exit affect the rest of the game…will one of those Double Eviction weeks just get ditched for a regular week?

For those of you that found my blog through my Survivor or Amazing Race Recaps, or perhaps through Sirlinksalot, TV Clubhouse or EW.com, please keep in mind that my recaps will always be based on the TV airings of Big Brother. I do not, and will not, be watching or reading any info from the live feeds. Please keep that in mind as I intend to keep the entire season on my site SPOILER-FREE.

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