May 11, 2009

My god, with all the TV shows hitting their season finales in the coming week, the content for this blog is about to plummet! I hope you all like hearing about poker, because the only new TV shows starting this summer are new seasons of Big Brother and Top Chef Masters. But here’s the rundown on the previous week’s shows.

Hell’s Kitchen

I really hate the faux drama of anything on Fox. And the fact that 20 minutes of TV gets stretched out to an hour, especially with Hell’s Kitchen. And to once again drag out the season finale over two weeks is just excruciating. There’s no need to manufacture any sort of extension to the inevitable. Just give Paula the job now, and air a re-run of World’s Most Dangerous Car Chases or something equally ridiculous.

Survivor

Debbie was weird…and a little bit crazy…and not so bright. I mean, honestly, what middle school principal can’t grasp the concept of $20 increments?!? I wasn’t a fan of her, so I’m glad she’s gone, but the plan to NOT eliminate Coach is certainly making for some great TV. The ‘loved ones’ episode of Survivor is always a total cheese-fest, and this was no difference, but the fact that Coach’s ‘loved one’ was his Assistant Coach is just too funny. I can’t see a scenario that doesn’t have Taj, Stephen, and J.T. in the finale. Stephen should win.

Amazing Race

I always hate that the finale is only one hour, a regular episode, with no reunion afterwards. This year’s edition would have definitely made for some fireworks. I’m not disappointed that Tammy and Victor won, but I am quite happy that Luke and Margie did NOT win, especially after getting to the final roadblock so far ahead of the other team, and then Luke blowing the final challenge. What a gratuitous way to get everyone into skimpy bikinis in the final Roadblock, huh? Carrying a dead, seasoned pig down the beach for a luau. And as smokin’ as the Hottie cheerleaders looked, how brutal is it that all I could think of is how awesome that pig would taste once it was roasted?!

Lost (Jenn and Jeff - safe to read)

The finale is this Wednesday, with a one-hour recap show at 8:00, and then the two-hour finale at 9:00. WNP is that night, and there’s no chance I’m not going to wait until Thursday to watch it, so it is going to be a late night, and I’m going to be exhausted on Thursday! I’m looking forward to it, as the Lost finales are consistently the best episodes of the year, and while I have a suspicion about what is going to happen, I hope I’m wrong, because I want to be surprised.

And now, time to rant…

Celebrity Apprentice

I’m disgusted that Joan Rivers won. Absolutely disgusted. And before any of you jump on me for being angry that ‘the poker player’ didn’t win, hear me out. In all the previous incarnation of The Apprentice (Celebrity or otherwise), I’ve felt that the right choice was made in terms of who got hired. In last year’s Celebrity Apprentice, I absolutely hated Piers Morgan throughout the entire season. He was a pompous and arrogant, but at the end of the day, he did the best job, and deserved to win, regardless of how much I couldn’t stand him. Up until this point in the past seasons, Trump (for all of his faults) still fettered through all of the crap to pick the best person.

But this season, the fix was in. And people who know me and read here know that I generally don’t buy into conspiracy theories. But all season long, it was a love-fest for Joan, regardless of how she behaved. She was this comedy legend who got a free pass to act in the most reprehensible manner, all because Trump loved her. And then she turned on the waterworks to paint her charity as more deserving than any others, so why even have the challenges to begin with? If you’re just going to give the prize to the oldest contestant with the most stamina, who is the most passionate about her charity, then why even go through the façade of having the tasks? I guess you couldn’t fit all of the Kodak, All, Right Guard, and Chicken of the Sea product placements, then.

It was an obvious dramatic setup of good vs. evil, with the plan being all along to have the ‘good’ side win, but I still can’t fathom how Joan Rivers is the ‘good’ in this equation. Last year’s Piers vs. Trace finale was good vs. evil as well, but the perceived ‘evil’ side still won, and justly so. But I guess in these scary economic times, NBC viewers needed a happy ending. (my apologies to anyone who just threw up in their mouth at the thought of ‘Joan Rivers’ and ‘Happy Ending’ being grouped together. ) I wasn’t a Joan-hater before this show, but I’ve definitely lost all respect for her as an entertainer, and a person.

Like her or not, Annie was a consistent winner, and carried herself professionally in the boardroom at all times. She was a tireless fund-raiser, and a smart and efficient project manager, as well as being a hard worker for others. Joan was a malcontent who lost with regularity and complained about everything, personally attacking anyone and anything that she didn’t agree with. And in an infantile and offensive manner. I couldn’t believe that her behaviour was tolerated. Any competent prospective employer would have fired her on the spot. She barked at anyone who interrupted her, but then wouldn’t let anyone answer their own questions, instead talking overtop of them and insulting them again.

How on earth can someone behave in that manner in front of a prospective employer, then have a tantrum and quit because their daughter was fired (reverse nepotism?), then return, continue to insult co-workers, use racist comments to describe others, have no respect for business adversaries, and then be rewarded? It makes no sense.

And it’s not because I like Annie Duke, and because she’s a poker player. Joan Rivers could have been up against Chad Kroeger or Geddy Lee, and I still would have been equally as disgusted that she won.

What a farce. I’ll never watch future editions of The Apprentice again. And I hope viewers do the same since it’s so transparently obvious that the process is irrelevant.