April 8, 2010: Survivor Recap

Since I missed last week's episode of Survivor, I watched it right before this week's episode...a back-to-back Heroes vs. Villains bonanza. I will be recapping the new episode in full below, but first, a couple of thoughts on last week's episode.

- Colby re-emerged as the physical force we all remember from Survivor: Australian Outback, and no longer appeared to be 'Superman in a fat suit', as he was lovingly referred to as by James in the last episode. AND he got a chance to completely chuck Jerri aside in the water-basketball challenge. How much fun do you think that was for him with the history those two have?

- Voting Rob out was the dumbest move that the Villains tribe could have done. Yes, I respect Russell and his game, but Russell only thinks of the NOW, and not what he needs for later. (See last season and Natalie's win in the finale) Voting Rob out and making their tribe massively weaker was a dumb move that will cost him the game. I'm not saying he would have won otherwise, but now there is no way. He just won't be able to keep numbers with his tribe constantly losing without Rob.

- How about that snub by Rob as Coach went in for the man-hug? Ouch.

Ok, on to this week's episode, which began with a "Previously On Survivor" homage to Rob that was worthy of the Fallen Comrades montage we always see heading into the final immunity challenge. The producers sure didn't want him to leave, did they?

Parvati then declared that it was "Game On." Do we really need to hear that in every episode?

And now Jerri is regretting voting Rob out? Right after Tribal Council? Did she not think this through? Why all of a sudden?

At the Heroes camp, J.T. went off and found the hidden immunity idol in about 10 seconds. I really think that the name Hidden Immunity Idol should be retired until they actually start hiding it well again. Remember a few seasons ago when Yul had to line up a tree in his line of sight with another tree, then find the spot where they met and dig deep into the sand to find it? Now they're just laying around everywhere. It should just be called the Intricately Placed Immunity Idol until they start finding better spots for them and making the contestants actually work to find them.

But as soon as he found it, Amanda stumbled upon him and he told her that he found it. Then Candace wandered by and she found out too. So he adopted the Russell strategy of "I'll just tell everyone", and told the whole tribe that he had it. Seems like a good strategy if they all make it to the merge, but not so much if the Heroes have to vote someone off before then. We'll see how it pans out.
I thought Jeff Probst's "Drop your...expectations" line was pretty inventive. But I wish that it hadn't been spoiled already by the commercials all week. Teasing a merge and then not merging is one of the greatest swerves that Survivor can pull, so I'm not sure why they tipped their hand early on this one. Remember back in Thailand when he told the tribes that they would be living on the same beach, and they all assumed they were merged until Jeff told them that they weren't? THAT was a good twist.

The bowling challenge was boring...again. The Villains might as well have been called The Gutterballs, and the Heroes won handily. How different do you think that challenge would have been if Boston Rob was still around?

Back at camp, Jerri had a little tantrum about the team's decision to tear down the camp under the assumption that there was going to be a merge. This is starting to be a trend with Jerri...acting first, and then considering that decision after the fact. She may want to consider the implications of things BEFORE she decides to do them next time. Just an idea...

She even went on to say that "Rob would have made sure that Sandra and Courtney competed", so that they could sit the two weaker players for the immunity challenge. Well, if she knows that Rob would have done it...then why didn't she?? This of course set off an argument with Sandra, who didn't like being "blamed" for the loss, and labelled a weak player.

She went on to just argue everything from that point forward, showing her fiesty Puerto Rican spirit, and declaing to the camera that she simply hated everyone. I mean, if Sandra and Courtney's game plan was to come to camp, sit out of as many challenges as possible, and try to get far...good luck to you both. But to think that you can go 20 days without your tribemates noticing this is pretty naive. Best of luck to you...

Coach lamented that "I don't want to play this game with these people. Not without Tyson. Not without Rob." This is the same argument he used in his first time on Survivor, declaring that he didn't want to play with people who weren't 'honourable', like he is. He's just a whiny little bitch who complains when things don't go exactly as he wants, like a spoiled rich kid who gets to choose his friends. Can you imagine being a player if he was your coach?

But here's the rub...as he's complaining about Rob going home, he's venting to Courtney, who he wanted to vote out! And, he still wrote her name down. I'm no genius, but I have to think that complaining to the person you wanted gone about how the last vote went, may not result in the most sympathetic ear.

The Immunity challenge was another easy win for the Heroes, as Courtney and Sandra single-(double?)-handedly assured that the Villains lost with their ineptitude. Courtney was so skinny that she should have been able to get under the gates without really getting dirty, but she still wasn't competitive. I don't really have much else to say about this challenge other than the fact that Rupert looked like a Chocolate Kraken.
At Tribal Council, Danielle declared that 'It is what it is", thus incurring another one of Sean's Reality TV Show Cliche penalties.

I was glad to see Jeff call out Courtney on something I have been mentioning since the beginning of this season, that she sits out almost every challenge. She got defensive, but came back with a pretty good line:

"It's target the weak, and I'm, like, poster child for Weak Survivor. But I'm still here over a bunch of strong players...twisted ankle, skinny chick, whatever. I'm a determined little bitch, and I'll put up with a lot of crap to get to the end."

And as great as that line was, it was followed by one of the lamest moments in Survivor history as Sandra leaned over and said "Fist Bump" before offering her fist to Courtney.
Ok, first of all, once you put your fist out to bump, it's implied that you're looking for the bump. If you have to say "Fist Bump", you probably shouldn't be bumping fists in the first place. Second of all, look at the picture above of the actual Fist Bump. Jerri is looking down at her feet, not wanting any part of it as she sits between them, and Russell and Parvati are just looking at each other trying not to laugh.

Courtney's parting shot to Coach as she was voting was pretty entertaining, as well, as she called him a "Frigging Lunatic", and scoffed at the feather in his hair.

I have a new penalty option for Survivor contestants. Anyone who writes their vote with a sad, upside-down smiley face should be eliminated immediately. Unacceptable.

So the Villains voted out Coach and continued on their downward spiral. Tyson, then Rob, then Coach. This team is going nowere fast. I also think it's important to note that Danielle and Parvati changed their votes, but not Russell or Jerri. The only thing that may save them is J.T.'s assumption that there is a female alliance, which looks like it could lead to one of the dumbest moves in Survivor history.

But I'm only saying that because that's what the preview for next week showed us...giving us some incredibly dumb moves and then teasing us that J.T. wants to give the idol to Russell. Well, that certainly would qualify...

We'll have to wait until next week to find out.